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How’s your relationship with you? It makes a dif

How’s your relationship with you? It makes a difference to every aspect of your well-being, including your health.

I’ve spoken this week about inner stress - the roots of which are associated with feelings like shame & guilt, and tendencies like self-criticism, perfectionism, people pleasing, poor boundaries, and there’s much more.

Often we adopt these tendencies in our developmental years - to adapt & survive whatever we were going through, and by observing behaviours modelled to us by others.

Unfortunately, sometimes we end up getting crossed messages, or we may have experienced unhealthy situations that caused us to believe certain things about others & ourselves that aren’t true.

Then we end up not being kind to ourselves. We let others cross our boundaries. We prioritize others over our own needs. We allow others to treat us disrespectfully. Often, because we aren’t treating ourselves respectfully.

It starts with you. Your relationship with you. How you treat yourself. If you don’t treat yourself kindly, if you don’t consider yourself with respect, it’s pretty hard for others to do so, because you teach others how you want to be treated.

Start with you. Learn to appreciate & accept yourself. Develop self-compassion. Take some time to know yourself. It does make a difference in every aspect of life.

Finding someone you trust to guide you through this process can be invaluable, as they help you “co-regulate” your nervous system, so this work can be so much more effective.

Send me a message to @wellbalanceND if you’d like to see if my approach is best for you to guide you back to yourself - so you can heal the emotional roots of your physical symptoms of chronic illness - even if you’ve tried all the diets, including Carnivore.

Otherwise, I hope this post has given you some helpful insight. Start by developing a healthy relationship with you. You deserve it 💖

Yesterday I mentioned how inner stress can cause i

Yesterday I mentioned how inner stress can cause inflammation.

Often, we adopt these ways because we don’t feel enough the way we are. We want to be accepted by others in order to feel whole. When others are happy with us, we can finally be happy.

But it rarely works out that way.

Instead, we experience negative inner stress & pressure, which de-regulates our nervous system & eventually causes de-regulation of other systems in the body - like immune & digestive systems, hormones, neurotransmitters & even metabolism.

What to do instead?

Developing “antidotes” can help you overcome & transform that inner stress.

Studies show self-compassion, self-knowledge, present-moment awareness & a sense of purpose are all effective at reducing perceived stress & physical implications of stress, including inflammation.

These are things I help my own clients develop & it makes a huge difference.

When you feel confident in your own sense of inner-knowing, your attention is focused on this moment right now (instead of your hamster wheel of what-ifs & worries) & you learn to develop a strong sense of compassion & acceptance of yourself, those negative inner stressors no longer control you…or your body.

It may sound simple, but it makes a big difference. The key is to do it - which isn’t always easy when you don’t know where to start.

Start with awareness. Pay attention to your inner dialogue. You might be surprised what you discover.

If you know the journey to self-acceptance is your missing piece of the puzzle - you’ve tried all the diets (especially Carnivore) & you know this deeper work is what will help you finally get control over chronic illness symptoms like fatigue, pain, bloating, etc - you might be a fit for my 6-month 1:1 package, Empowered You.

I guide you to knowing & accepting your true self. When you do, transformation happens: more energy, less pain, better digestion, as well as a sense of calm & confidence. Clients routinely tell me they finally feel in control - often for the very first time.

If you’re ready for this type of transformation, send me a DM to @wellbalancend . I’m happy to chat & see if you’re a fit 💖
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Studies show emotions like shame, guilt & self-cri

Studies show emotions like shame, guilt & self-criticism cause internal stress - which promote inflammation through the association between the nervous system & immune system - especially when expressed chronically.

These emotions, particularly shame, are often produced as self-preservation tactics from “social threat” - like events that make you feel devalued in relation to others. In brief situations, this can be protective, motivating us to perform.

But when we experience these feelings constantly, our physical body & mind pay the price. One study showed children whose parent was overly critical exhibited excessive amounts of shame chronically.

During our developmental years, if we adopt tendencies like these, we’re more apt to engrain them into our consciousness - they become part of the inner dialogue we “think” is us. But it’s not.

We can turn this around. Studies discuss a variety of what I call “antidotes” to these stressful feelings.

Self-knowledge, present-moment awareness (also called mindfulness), self-compassion, and a sense of purpose are examples of mindsets that have been proven to reduce the stress response, reduce inflammation, and improve symptom management, especially for those of us with chronic illnesses like autoimmune.

Start with self-knowledge - having awareness & understanding of ourselves is always the first step to making positive change. Because you can’t change what you can’t see.

Then learn how to focus on the present moment. It can take some practice. It helps when you’ve taught your nervous system that it’s safe. There are many ways to do this. I use a specific set of tools with my own clients - it’s the first step to allow everything else to work best.

It becomes much easier to then learn self-compassion. This allows us to develop a sense of confidence, self-acceptance, and most importantly, self-love. When we develop these things, we are more easily able to turn away from chronic self-criticism, shame, and guilt. This positively impacts our physical health in many ways.

For more like this, make sure to follow @wellbalanceND & turn on post notifications.

What do you think about the antidotes? I’d love to know 👇

This beautiful post about confidence by my friend

This beautiful post about confidence by my friend Tracey had to be shared...

Posted @withregram • @tracey_mcbeath_health

Want to be more confident? Start by becoming more present 🧡

I’ve seen recently where confidence lives.

A number of insights have come to me over the last 10 months since my hashimotos diagnosis.

I’ve been exploring with Michelle Dowker @wellbalancend by my side ways to heal my illness with food that goes in to my body & the thoughts that ruminate in my mind.

To heal, I believe we need to look at both.

And I’ve realised a few important things about confidence, that I know isn’t found in any book, course or come from someone else.

I believe confidence is innate within us all. Not just some of us. All of us.

I’ve seen feelings of insecurity arise in me when I’m inside my head & focusing on myself.

When I’m inside my head, I’m out of the present moment & not in life.

When I stop focusing on my thinking & instead shift my focus back to the present moment, I naturally feel my innate confidence rise to the surface.

I’ve seen made-up beliefs around who I should be, what I should think, what I should say all contribute to insecure feelings when I want to actually be, think & say something else.

But I’ve seen (finally) that I can be me.

I can be, think, say & do what I want. I can be myself & others can take it or leave it. I know that that isn’t on me & I’m so ok with that.

I’ve seen when I focus on thinking that says I’m better (know more) than those I’m with, I feel what I think looks like confidence. But when I’m with people who I think are better than me, I feel insecure.

But both are an illusion.

I’m no better or worse than anyone. We’re all humans doing the best we can. If someone has more insight that me, I can learn from them. But it doesn’t make them better than me. And if I’ve had more insight that someone else, that doesn’t make me better than them.

It really just allows us to make connections & share experiences as human beings.

All this insight come because of a diagnosis. For that I am grateful.

“We are stars wrapped in skin - the light you are seeking has always been within.” 🧡

It’s common knowledge stress affects health & sy

It’s common knowledge stress affects health & symptoms. But so many think if they can just control the stress around them, they’ll be OK.

That external stress, for many of us, is just a drop in the bucket compared to the amount of INTERNAL stress we put on ourselves: inner pressure, self criticism, perfectionism, shame, guilt, people pleasing, and so much more.

Now, all of these tendencies we developed for important reasons. Often, as protective mechanisms, to cope with whatever situation we went through, especially during our developmental years.

However, if we adopt these habits into our regular routine, and they become the background noise of our subconscious, these constant feelings, thoughts & beliefs wear away at our nervous system, creating all sorts of imbalances in hormones, neurotransmitters, immune & digestive function, metabolism, and so much more.

We don’t need to let this outdated record play in the background of our minds. It served a purpose, but we can choose a new way.

And when we do, our lives, health, and bodies finally get the opportunity not only to heal, but to flourish in beautiful ways.

The first step is always awareness. You can’t change what you can’t see. Start to notice your inner dialogue. If you hadn’t been paying attention, you might be surprised with what you notice.

The next step I guide my own clients though is to teach the nervous system it’s now safe. This helps set the stage for you to allow for new possibility.

Then, learning how to think about ourselves differently. Developing self-acceptance is a foundation here that unlocks doors to new ways.

These changes take pressure off the nervous system, releasing so much of that internal stress, and in turn, providing the body a chance to right itself.

This makes all the difference for physical symptoms, especially for those of us with chronic illnesses like autoimmune or endometriosis.

Do you believe inner stress can contribute to physical symptoms? 👇
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Lots of talk goes to diet for symptom & weight man

Lots of talk goes to diet for symptom & weight management. For those of us with chronic illness who struggle with fatigue, pain, digestive troubles & more, diet CAN make a difference.

But if you’re JUST looking at diet, you’re missing a huge opportunity to get control over symptoms.

This is especially important if you’re not seeing the results you want, you’re stuck or stalled, or you’re finding you have to get more & more strict in order to keep symptoms managed.

You see, there’s so much underneath the surface. Think of it like an iceberg & diet is the tip. When you look underneath, there’s so much more to address.

Things like sleep, hormones, inflammation, digestion, immune function, stress & emotions all play a role.

Now, one of the things listed, namely nervous system regulation, is a big factor that can affect all of the above in many ways.

When your nervous system isn’t regulated, neither is any of what I just listed.

When you start doing the work to regulate your nervous system, everything else starts falling into place. It’s that important.

Which is why it’s the very first step I guide my own clients through. Because nothing else we do will stick unless we do this work first.

And if you’re not doing this work, then diet will only take you so far.

I see it all the time with women I work with who’ve whittled all the way to Carnivore to manage symptoms. They become more & more reactive to foods. Reintroduction seems impossible.

We do the work to regulate the nervous system, then dive a layer deeper & heal the emotional roots of physical symptoms.

Once we do this, tolerance to foods improves & we can successfully start a strategic reintroduction process.

On top of that, this work helps them feel more in control of not only their health, but entire lives.

So if you’re just looking at diet, I urge you to look below the surface, especially if you’re not seeing all the results you expected.

Make sure to follow me at @wellbalancend & hit post notifications to learn more about this.

I’d love to know: do you look deeper than diet? 👇
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